I speak for the trees, for the trees have no tongues.
Having written a note to the other half of the species, I would like to direct a comment your way as well.
Once upon a time I tried to convince my four-year-old son Aarick, who was in danger of wishing to be a girl like Mommy, that boys have way more fun. I touched on sports, on career options, and on authority, concluding with a clinching argument: “And you see, when a man loves a lady, he can ask her to marry him; but a lady has to wait and it’s hard.” My son thought about that for a while and said, “When a lady asks, does a man say ‘Yes, but don’t do it again’?”
A man was created to initiate. When he does it (her acceptance: his bliss / her rejection: his agony), he’s entering into his birthright, which cannot quite be taken away no matter what her reply. A woman was created to respond. It’s pretty hard to respond to silence, and her birthright is in danger at every moment: from his reticence, his indifference, and his rejection.
Single men may grouse about uninterested women as they wish (and with good reason), but single women have not yet found a platform from which to grouse about uninterested men.
I speak for the trees.
I confess it: I still argue that a greater percentage of single men than single women are single by choice, but I do see that Percentage and Choice have little comfort to offer a broken heart. No one chooses rejection. Or silence. Or no.
We are, in fact, trying to understand a most mysterious dance, similar (if you will forgive me) to the problem of a job for every worker. Here are the jobs. Here are the workers. Why can’t we match them up?
Even if the supply exactly matched the demand (a sanguine hope in this fallen world), someone would end up being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Someone would say no to the job so freely offered; someone would hanker for the job not meant for him; someone would try to work a second job on the swing shift; and some would be too lazy to pursue even one. And then imagine a world in which the jobs were given their druthers as well! “Nope, don’t want that guy; nope. Nope.”
Because in the end, very few of us just want a match. We want The One.
To you dear ladies, whose side I am on… and to you … uh… men… whose side can fight for itself… If you and The One have not yet found each other, remember that you face more than a simple problem of information. (If he just knew that you wanted a man…! Or if she just knew how many women you’d asked already…!) You face a more complex situation–and a more competent God–than all that.
Take heart. Be strong. Step forward in faith.
But let those of us who are already dancing with a partner put in a little plug for you now and then.