OtherSpeak: Fifth Year Lament


Guest posts / Friday, April 24th, 2020

Today’s poignant post is shared by Evelyn Hershberger, mother of four. She says this week “marks five years since my mother was welcomed forever into Jesus’ presence. Two years ago on February 3rd, my first and only daughter was born. She’s so sweet and busy and has a lot to say! Lately I feel like another dimension has been added to grieve the loss of my mom. When my daughter says, “I want to go to Grandma’s house,” or “I like Grandma!” I feel so sad. True, I am glad that she has ONE Grandma, at least; her paternal grandparents are both still living. But how I wish she could know my mother. How I wish I could share my daughter with my mom! I wrote this poem as I was processing, and it helps – a little.”


“I want to go to Grandma’s house,” her eyes

Summer blue sky, her voice a lilting note.

Your Grandma certainly affection buys.

And yet the grief! It clutches at my throat!

Oh what delight! Alas not mine! To be

A mother, yet beloved daughter still.

A circle—motherly felicity!

To nurture, yet be succored when I will.

Could heart that loved me touch my daughter too!

A shared experience; understanding forged.

Her happy spirit imprint child of mine!

Yet death, a heartless, heavy chasm gorged.

Let signature of buoyant, gracious soul,

Be through me mirrored plainly, pictured whole!

– By Evelyn Hershberger


What do these words make you feel? What would you like to say in response to Evelyn and her daughter?

8 Replies to “OtherSpeak: Fifth Year Lament”

  1. Oh Evie,
    This is heartwrenching and beautiful. I wish your little girl could know how your mom and how special she was….but, I know she lives on in each of her girls. Love you, girl.
    Thank you for sharing with us. With love, Kim

    1. Thank-you, Evelyn, for sharing these touching words! And thank-you,Shari, for “sharing your space!” The words struck a tender chord in my heart.
      For me, it’s the grief of having never known my Mother-in-law. Now the added grief is not being able to take our young children to their (paternal) Grandpas’ house, as their Grandpa passed away 2 years ago.
      Last spring our first baby girl was born. We gave to her her Grandma’s name for her middle name.
      May God’s love and precious memories sustain you, Evelyn. I will pray for you as Mother’s Day approaches. (It would almost seem as though God takes the most “special Moms” too soon… ) It would be interesting to hear how you help your children “know their Grandma.” Feel free to e-mail me.

  2. Thanks for sharing this, Evie. I often feel a pang in my heart when i look at Eleanor too, thinking about how that she will never (No, not never–just not yet) know your mother. Your mom would have loved her dearly. And yes, you (and your sisters) often remind me of your mom and her gracious, servant spirit. It helps me to talk to my children often about my mom, so the younger children learn to know her though stories. I miss your mom a lot. Love and hugs, Ruth

  3. This poem puts words to my feelings better than I ever could hope to do. October will mark 15 years since my mom is gone and we still miss her. It makes me sad to know that my children will never know her. My daughter will be two this summer. Blessings to you and yours!

  4. Beautiful words! This is a pain I know nothing about but I can only imagine how hard it is! There is such a delight in seeing your mom love your own children!
    I’m sorry for your pain! Hugs❤❤

  5. This makes me cry, because I DO know the joy of having my mother meet each of my children. And live near them and interact regularly with them. And while I don’t know you, it makes me sad that you can’t experience that. I also cry for your daughter. I knew all 4 of my grandparents, as well as 4 of my great-grandparents and it is so rich. All I know is that God knows all losses, and can minister to you where you are. God bless you and care for you in your journey. A mom of 7

Add a comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.