—see previous post here—
Without making too many blanket statements, let’s try this one on for size:
Every man has a hobby or two that his wife finds at best, excessive—at worst, little short of completely ridiculous.
(Hurray for marriage! I truly love this journey.)
I call these hobbies Man Caves. I don’t mean in the modern sense: the back room of the house where the TV, the stuffed moose, and the peanuts reside. I’m talking about a place men go in their minds. You might call it Total Detachment from Reality.
Nearly every man has a few of these caves. This time of year, their wives know what I am talking about: they are called Tree Stands.
But there are other caves, as diverse as the men who inhabit them.
Football Watching. Antique Collecting. Unprofitable Fishing. Computer Gaming. Extensive Reading. Catching Some Rays. Watching Funny Stuff on YouTube. Tinkering in the Garage. Playing Basketball with the Guys. Listening to Rush Limbaugh. Sitting in the Bathroom for Long Periods of Time Reading the News.
And I did mention Tree Stands, did I not?
Behind every great man there stands a good woman… rolling her eyes.
She doesn’t really mind him having a hobby, for goodness’ sake, but couldn’t it be something that like makes sense? I mean, if he really thought about it would he want to spend all his time doing that when he could be—
Anyway, couldn’t he stay aware of what’s happening around him? The kids might be fighting, the Lord might be returning, it might be Christmas morning, for pete’s sake. And yet he is cheerfully unmoved.
We wives are a demanding set.
And the thing she really minds, the thing that really gets her goat, is the fact that he is not open to appeal on this point. In this one matter, he-who-loves-her-and-is-usually-so-attentive-and-considerate really does not care what she thinks. Or wants. Or had in mind for their evening together.
She could handle it all better if he would explain how important this is to him. If he sat down with her and said “Wife, I am going to spend the next four hours of my life watching meaningless hunting movies I’ve seen ten times before, because I’m so excited about going out myself that I just can’t stand it” then maybe she could understand and accept this.
But he never talks much about it. The more she hounds him, the more elusive he is. And he’s not really that stubborn about it (meaning, he doesn’t fight for it, he doesn’t insist on it) he just does it. Silently. And without realizing The Passing of Time, The Irritation of His Wife, or The Sad Future Welfare Of His Children’s Souls If He Fails to Spend Time with Them Tonight.
The point being—what should a wife do when her husband is There, doing his thing?
More next time.