The Tree of My Emotional Connections

Exercise: “Breaking the Sound Barrier”
Prompt: Switch two paragraphs in this post, and overcapitalize things.


It is a curious thing that in my early adult life, part of my growing up was to let go of the Family First mindset that had worn its groove deep into my modus operandi. As I walked with God in community, I learned to branch out, to extend priority to others, and to form deep and intimate connections with people who didn’t share my blood and my name, whether those people were mentors, friends, or children in my home.

It worked, and the tree of my emotional connections grew wide roots and branches. I learned to love people who were not Of Me as if they Were.

Are.

And then I got older still, and somehow the lesson circled back, and quietly made my family—my birth and chosen family of origin: my parents and siblings and in-laws and nieces and nephews: the whole package—grow more treasured with each year that passes.

I like this space in my heart, open for others, open for us.

I like us.

These are some of the most precious people in the world to me.

It is not a perfect family. We are missing parts of our hearts, and grieving in ways you won’t see here.

But also they bring me to tears, in the best ways. They share memories that no one else does, and quirks, and dreams. They speak words that fill me with joy.

At some point as we were leaving the nest, it mattered a lot to me that my siblings Chose Well, that they Stayed on the Path and Made Us Proud. I had a lot of certainty, a lot of arrogance in our perceived identity. Today, I am proud to be with them and of them, as we really are. And I hope I pick the Good Path like they did, the path of seeking and finding Christ, of being brave and humble and flexible and true-hearted.

I don’t have a smart way to end this post.
I hope that in your life, you have people like this.
People who love you like this.

Love,
Shari


Well, in some ways this prompt was easy to cheat on, because I switch paragraph orders all the time in my work. It doesn’t show, or matter. But look at those capitals popping.

Who do you find it easy to love?

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Osiah Horst
1 month ago

Why are you hiding in this photo, Shari?

Shari Zook
1 month ago
Reply to  Osiah Horst

Very astute.

I am hiding because I was the photographer, and I tapped the self-timer button and ran into the shot, and couldn’t see where my own head was. I just knew that on the proceeding shot, I had been concealed behind my son, so I leaned in close to my husband and smiled.

That’s why. 😊

Sylvia Horst
1 month ago

I am curious about who is who in the photo. But I haven’t actually seen most of your family members now for the last 24-25 years, so besides you (because of your photos/blog), I know your parents and that’s about it. Life kept on happening and you all matured so much!

I find that it is easier to love people when one feels safe in the relationship! We all want to be seen, safe, soothed, and securely attached. God is the only one who does this perfectly. And He knows how to help us dig deep and love one another with abandon.

Claudia
1 month ago

Lovely post, but I have an unrelated question. I remember you writing a poem (or rather, reading a poem you wrote) in the shape of a tear, something like “if there are no tears in heaven, how will we make sense of what humans did to each other on earth.”
For some reason, I can’t unearth it. May I have a link? May I quote you?

Just finished reading The Naked Don’t Fear the Water. 🥹

The Boss
1 month ago
Reply to  Claudia

@claudia, here is the tear poem you referenced.
https://sharizook.com/tearless/

Shari Zook
1 month ago
Reply to  The Boss

Thank you, love.

And yes, Claudia… Quoting if you wish is fine. 💜 Thanks for asking.

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